Happy April Fool’s Day!
Did you know that April 1st is a day where no one is born? There’s so much to see and learn about on April 1st. Did you hear that it’s the day Leaf Ericksfather and his sea Vikings discovered the Viking tradition of burning their dead? If anybody tells you it’s their birthday today, burn them.
I thought today would be a good day to introduce to you our new feature,
“Vaticanews”
Vaticanews brings you the latest updates straight from the Vatican.
Today’s bulletins:
• modern art will be let into the Vatican for the first time in five hundred years,
• cardinals announced yesterday that attack ferrets were being trained to defend the Pope and his blessed garments,
• and “There Is Nothing Wrong With Sneezing And Then Wiping Your Hand Under The Couch’s Arm,” say Vatican officials in response to Tanzanese political pressure.
Our top story of the day is very relevant: Popes can’t play April Fool’s jokes. That’s right, due to a new and ancient document discovered by pararcheodoxologists in the Gulf of Utah, it is believe that the last thing Jesus said to Peter, who was soon to be the first Pope of Earth, the first thing He said to him was, “Seriously, keep your act together. You’re the Pope now. Be cool. Don’t play. Don’t ever play, not even on - ” That’s where the scroll ends, but experts believe the next words out His mouth were, “April the 1st.” So there you have it, no April Fool’s jokes at all allowed to any Pope anywhere. Think about that.
Thus concludes another edition of,
“Vaticanews”
In closing I’d like to direct your attention to a new blog you should all start reading. It’s brought to you by a friend of ours named Space Pope.
Space Pope’s Blog
I like it a lot. Be cool. Don’t play.
- - What Productions, You?
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